Well, first of all, this is not going to be a remix to an AC/DC song. I haven’t gotten into song writing just yet. BUT, after a few Pure Barre classes you might be “knocking me (someone) out with those American thighs”.
Friends, family members and complete strangers often ask me what Pure Barre is. What should they expect? Is it a dance class? Like yoga? How about Pilates?
Let’s take a trip down memory lane to my first class a little under five years ago…
You may feel a little hesitant walking up to the studio, but no fear, you’ll be greeted by a Barre-tender, Teacher or client…and if you’re lucky all three.
After you get your paperwork filled out and head on into the studio your Teacher will be sure to explain to you what to expect and of course what tucking is:
Before you know it, the teacher is introducing herself to everyone and getting the class started. Wait is this a step aerobics class? Marching band? Are we about to bust out into a killer step routine?
What is even happening right now?
“Quickly coming down to the floor” – Oh, ok, we’re heading to the floor this should be easy. First up, a little something that looks like this…
Well, this isn’t too bad...
Soon after, your teacher gets you setup in forearm plank and you hear her say “you’re here for 90 seconds”. 90 seconds? Psh, that’s a breeze! About 10 seconds into it you’re thinking…
When will I get to the end of this plank?!
She’s counting the last 10. YES! It’s got to be break time, right?
Nope, not even close.
Oh my gosh, why do these feel impossible?!
Yes, finally a stretch…wait, that’s it – I wasn’t done stretching.
Just before standing up to go into weight work, you’ll fire up your triceps a bit and it will feel like your teacher is asking you to do this:
She’s not serious, is she?
Two or three pound weights. Finally! Something I can handle.
But, by the end of the weight work it will feel a little more like this…
Is someone going to give me a high 5?
Nope? Ok. Now we’re heading to the barre.
What happens over the next minutes of your life can best be visualized like this:
Shaking is a good thing? Oh, no. Something is seriously not ok right now.
By the end of this, I will have super human strength in my thighs for sure…if I survive.
“Make your way back to the center of the room to stretch it all out…”
I’m coming, don’t start without me.
Now on to the seat work. If you’re lucky, you’ll do something that’s a little like this:
Which will leave you feeling like:
I am OUT of here.
You survived. Class has got to be over soon, right? Or at least it’s time to stretch? Oh, wait, she’s even turning down the lights and getting mats out!
Your teacher will let you know you’re working on your abs, but for some reason you’re feeling it everywhere BUT your abs. Does this chick even know what she’s talking about?!
Am I the only one that is not getting this?!
Uh oh, music is coming back up. She just keeps telling me to exhale.. wait, we’re still working our abs? What is going on?
I’m focusing on my breath and my abs as much as can, but I know I can’t be doing this correctly.
Alright, now back to the center of the room to finish out your abs. WHAT?
Ok, if you say so…
I wonder what I should make for dinner tonight. FOCUS. Abs may be made in the kitchen, but you need to work on them here too!
Ok, great I survived. Abs are finally over.
Oh, I love this part, I feel like Superman.
…Superman after he’s finished saving the world.
She’s turning the lights off! Yes, we must be done…
“Tuck side to side” … Nope, still not done.
And then finally, you’re done you made it. You’re stretching and all you can think..
“Give yourself a round of applause.”
Dang right, I’ll give myself a round of applause. More like a standing ovation.
That is…if I can stand up.
I’m out of here! Will I be back?!
Yes! Yes! Yaaaaaasssss!
You tucking know it!
It might just leave you admiring all that hard work the next time you catch your reflection.